HELPING STRESSED DADS BALANCE WORK AND FATHERHOOD

Database, For Dads, Inspiration, New Dad Ian Dinwiddy Database, For Dads, Inspiration, New Dad Ian Dinwiddy

What is the Business Case for Enhanced Parental Leave?

Discover 3 key pillars to create a compelling business case for enhanced parental leave.

In this is article we explore these 3 key areas:

✅ Improves Employee Retention and Recruitment.

✅ Boosts Productivity and Engagement

✅ Supports Gender Equality Goals.

Why Is Enhanced Parental Leave More Important Than Ever?

In this post I’ll be examining how enhanced parental leave policies benefit UK businesses from an economic and cultural standpoint. But, before we get into the details of benefits for companies, let’s first explore what we mean by ‘Enhanced Parental Leave’ and then look at the big picture benefits for societies and families.

a) What is ‘Enhanced Parental Leave.’

The statutory requirements in the UK are very modest, amongst the worst in Europe…

Maternity Leave

“Statutory Maternity Pay (SMP) for eligible employees can be paid for up to 39 weeks, usually as follows:

  • the first 6 weeks: 90% of their average weekly earnings (AWE) before tax

  • the remaining 33 weeks: £184.03 or 90% of their AWE (whichever is lower)”

https://www.gov.uk/employers-maternity-pay-leave

Paternity leave

“Employees can choose to take either 1 week or 2 consecutive weeks’ leave…

Statutory Paternity Pay for eligible employees is either £184.03 a week or 90% of their average weekly earnings (whichever is lower). Tax and National Insurance need to be deducted.”

https://www.gov.uk/employers-paternity-pay-leave

Shared Parental Leave

In 2015, the UK introduced a shared parental leave policy allowing eligible parents to split up to 50 weeks of leave and up to 37 weeks of pay between them. This pay is at the statutory rates describes above.

The answer in literal terms: Enhanced Parental Leave could be anything above these Statutory levels.

1 week at 50% of pay would, for many men, be an enhancement to their current pay.

Not all enhanced leave is equal

The Inspiring Dads’ Parental Leave Database highlights organisations with:

  • Equal Leave - the same leave regardless of how you become a parent.

  • Equal Via SPL – where the shared parental leave pay and length of time matches maternity leave time and pay.

  • 6 weeks for Dad – leave that matches an organisation’s paternity leave with the statutory maternity provision.

b) The Macro-economic benefits

A Pregnant Then Screwed and Centre for Progressive Policy report in 2023  found that countries with more than six weeks of paid paternity leave have a 4% smaller gender wage gap and 3.7% smaller labour force participation gap. Their analysis also suggested that closing gender employment gaps could increase economic output by £23 billion.

In findings of a similar vein, the World Economic Forum's Global Gender Gap Report 2022 found that 80% of the gender pay gap was driven by Maternity leave. Leave is important for the well being of mothers and babies alike, but inequalities in the length of leave can entrench societal norms, reducing choice and the fuelling the gender pay gap.

c) Societal shift

The Pregnant Then Screwed and Centre for Progressive Policy report also found that just 18% of Brits think 2 weeks paternity leave or less is enough, but one in five (22%) dads and partners that are eligible for paternity leave take no leave at all.

Why would dads not be taking leave? When, according to the research from Zurich of 1,000 new dads, three quarters said they’d like to take up to 12 weeks off work at this time?

d) Because paternity leave doesn’t pay

Crucially it’s about finances.

As Tom Cruise’s character once said – “Show me the money!”

The Fatherhood Institute asked “What price for time with dad?” and calculated that a full-time employed father in the UK, on average earnings, can lose £1,021.04 when they take two weeks of statutory paternity leave.


The Business Case

1) Improves Employee Retention and Recruitment 

  • Research by Working Families and Bright Horizons shows that 48% of UK parents who have access to enhanced parental leave report higher job satisfaction and engagement, contributing to better long-term employee performance.

  • Bright Horizons found that 80% of UK employees feel more committed to their employer if they have access to flexible family-friendly policies, including enhanced parental leave.

  • In this article, Flexa look at why parental leave so important, and how does it benefit both employees and businesses?

    “Enhanced parental leave policies contribute to higher employee retention rates and create loyalty among employees. When companies provide ample time off for new parents, it shows that they value their employees' well-being and support their life outside of work. This can lead to increased job satisfaction and a stronger commitment to the company”.

“when looking for a new role, 43% of new dads look for paid paternity leave above bonus (42%) and salary (27%)”, which isn’t surprising when the same data showed that “of those that take no time at all, seven out of 10 can’t afford to”, while “a third of new dads were forced to take holiday while 12% resorted to unpaid leave in order to spend time with their new babies.”

2) Boosts Productivity and Engagement

Lisa S. Kaplowitz and Kate Mangino

  • The CIPD found that companies offering enhanced parental leave see improved mental health and well-being among returning employees, leading to higher productivity and lower absenteeism.

  • Further nuggets from the Pregnant Then Screwed and Centre for Progressive Policy report:

    “We find that a woman’s partner taking parental leave is associated with a 34% increase in the likelihood of a woman being physically able to return to work”

  • Lisa S. Kaplowitz and Kate Mangino, researching at Rutgers University identified a wide range of workplace skills that are developed through the process of care giving. Find out more in the HBR article “Caregiver Employees Bring Unique Value to Companies”


3) Supports Gender Equality Goals

  • The Fawcett Society, the UK’s leading membership charity campaign for gender equality and women’s rights at work, at home and in public life is seeking government to introduce a dedicated period of leave for fathers “paid closer to replacement earnings rate. Current shared parental leave legislation is welcome, but too few fathers will be able to take it.”

  • PWC’s Women in Work 2023 Report highlighted that:

    “In 2021, the OECD found the motherhood penalty accounted for 60% of the gender pay gap across 25 European countries, with factors… In Northern and Western European countries, the motherhood penalty accounted for 75% of the gender pay gap.”

  • Research by McKinsey (2020) showed that companies with a strong focus on diversity and inclusion, including robust parental leave policies, are 25% more likely to have above-average profitability, driven by diverse leadership teams that enhance innovation and decision-making.

Bonus reason - Reputational Kudos.

Man on LinkedIn posts sleep deprived picture with his baby. He thanks his employer for the opportunity to take 3 months leave. The comments blow up, the organic reach is astronomical. I notice and the employer makes it into the database

In Conclusion

Creating opportunities for your new parents to access well paid extended parental leave, regardless of how they become parents is being increasingly seen as a core part of the employee benefit offer.

As at 1st August 2025, The Inspiring Dads’ Parental Leave Database captures over 385 UK organisations.

👏 139 Equal Parental Leave offers,

👏 65 of which are at least 26 weeks full pay (see graphic)

👏 A further 87 organisations equalising Shared Parental Leave offer with Maternity leave.

👏 203 organisations in the UK who offer 6 weeks full pay for dads (ringfenced, not hidden within Shared Parental Leave)

The reason those numbers are rising every month is laid out in the evidence above - enhanced and equal parental leave positively impact employee retention, productivity, diversity, and long-term business growth in the UK. Crucially a fairer, better society has to include equality at choice around caring responsibilities. It’s the route to gender equality.  

Campaign to Make Things Better:

PS If you think that Men don’t Want to Take Leave?

Stats around the low update of shared parental leave paint a picture that could easily be misinterpreted but when organisations get the culture and pay ‘right’ and remove the issue of transferring leave men will take the leave they are entitled to.

Extra Resources

If you are considering introducing an Equal Parental Leave policy, here is a brilliant guide from Business In The Community which explores costs, benefits and tips for successful implementation. Plus see measurement tips and tricks from Careers After Babies.

Photo Credit Vitolda Klein @little_klein via Unsplash

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Mental Health, Money, New Dad, Relationships Ian Dinwiddy Mental Health, Money, New Dad, Relationships Ian Dinwiddy

5 Practical Tips to cope with the Impact of Fatherhood

This blog post walks you through 5 common practical impacts of fatherhood and gives you tips to navigate your way.

Practical Impacts of Fatherhood aka “You don't know what you don't know”

Becoming a dad for the first time can be tough, it doesn’t matter how many books you read you can’t know or be prepared for everything.

This blog post walks you through 5 common practical impacts of fatherhood and gives you tips to navigate your way.

·         Sleep Deprivation

·         Social Life

·         Discrimination

·         Money

·         Mental Health

 

1) Sleep Deprivation

Did you know that babies aren't considered physically able to sleep through the night until they are at least 6 months old? Sure, you can get lucky - our first, Freya was an amazing sleeper, but she screamed all day due to her reflux!

While our babies can’t prioritise sleep, adults have a lot more control, but sometimes sleeping doesn’t appear to be a good use of our time and there is a danger that you put your entertainment time ahead of sleep in the evenings. Yes, we all need to unwind, but allowing that to eat into sleep time is going to counterproductive. 

Consider my client Andy's observation:

"If you can prioritise you and your partners ability to sleep then a lot of the other things fall into place, it makes the hard stuff easier with a clear head.  If you're both sleep deprived, it makes even the minor issues trigger points for disagreement."

While the excellent and thought-provoking book Why We Sleep by Matthew Walker reminds us of the importance of sleep.

"It enhances your memory, makes you more attractive. It keeps you slim and lowers food cravings. It protects you from cancer and dementia. It wards off colds and flu. It lowers your risk of heart attacks and stroke, not to mention diabetes. You’ll even feel happier, less depressed, and less anxious."

2) Social Life (or not)

Photo Credit: @alevisionco via Unsplash

New parents’ lack of social life is a cliché for a reason. Life has changed, it won't be forever, but always remember that babies do not respect a hangover.

You need to think about three things

  • "Putting your oxygen mask on first"

  • Is it fair?

  • Time together

You need to look after yourself to be able look after other people. As they say when you fly, put your own oxygen mask on first. It's important to understand what social life / hobbies you need to stay happy and grounded. Then talk to your partner about how to arrange it and fit it in.

Think about fairness too. 

When is your partner getting a break? Are you facilitating that process? If your partner says they don't want to do anything social, do you take the easy way out and stop asking or do you do everything you can to give them their own space? It can be very easy for new mums to put everyone else's needs first; part of your ‘job’ is to make sure that doesn't happen.

Consider the impact if you're pursuing your hobbies and social life and your partner isn't. It's a sure-fire way to create serious relationship tension.

Time together

It can be tricky in the early days to get time together away from your baby, but even if it's just for a few hours, while someone covers a nap, I guarantee the feeling of being partners and not just parents can be amazing if you let it. 

Don't worry if you find yourself using that time to talk about your baby, we all do it!

Most importantly social life as a new parent requires planning and communication to ensure everyone gets the time "off" that they need, plus I think it's important to recognise and embrace how friendship groups change. You are going to find yourself becoming mates with the dads of your children's friends, embrace it!

3) Discrimination

There are split views on this – the TUC found a fatherhood bonus with dads getting promoted / earning more once they are fathers. Yet there is also research by remote meeting tech firm PowWowNow finding that dads also experience discrimination if they take time off to look after children:

👉 44% of fathers experienced discrimination in the workplace after exercising their right to take time off to look after their child. 

👉 1 in 4 fathers suffered verbal abuse or mockery after taking time off to look after their children.

It’s really tough to be a woman though

Pregnant Then Screwed stats on pregnancy discrimination are eye opening and the combination of potential discrimination against any parent is particularly hard on dual income couples who both want to be active parents and have great careers.

Being clear on your priorities as an individual and as a family is key here. It might be tricky, but forging the right path for you will make you happier in the long run!

4) Money

Having a baby typically leads to more outgoings v potentially less income, you can quickly move from being a ‘DINKY’ couple (Dual Income No Kids Yet) into a ‘SITCOM’ (Single Income Two Children and Oppressive Mortgage).

But it’s no laughing matter if you aren’t prepared.

Do a budget, understand where all your money goes and what are needs and what are nice to haves. Additionally, you should have honest conversations about how you share income. Joint account or allowances? Whose income pays for what or is it all in one shared account?

It’s important to discuss money challenges because they are the number 1 reason marriages fail.  

5) Mental Health

Mental health challenges in new dads are really common – the NCT report that “the number of men who become depressed in the first year after becoming a dad is double that of the general population.”

It’s not surprising when the focus is naturally on mum and baby, and it can feel really important to be strong and supportive for them. It can also be difficult to open up to those close to you, especially if you are not used to it or aren’t comfortable being vulnerable with friends and family.

But it matters. Talking to someone can be life changing or lifesaving, because it’s tough being pulled in different directions.

Photo Credit: @picsea via Unsplash

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Career, New Dad, Mental Health Ian Dinwiddy Career, New Dad, Mental Health Ian Dinwiddy

new Dads are new parents too

Nicki Seignot, Author of 'Mentoring New Parents at Work' and founder of The Parent Mentor talks to James and Ian in episode 36 of Lockdown Dads.

New dads are new parents too

Nicki Seignot, Author of 'Mentoring New Parents at Work' and founder of The Parent Mentor talks to James and Ian in episode 36 of Lockdown Dads.

We discuss why supporting new dads matters, the role single dad Phil played to broadening Nicki’s horizons, beyond just supporting the maternity journey and what the post pandemic work landscape could look like.

Plus the usual podcast musings about schools going back, sunshine (!) and looking forward to better future.

Contents

00:50 The power of daylight in the mornings

02:15 Schools going back

02:45 Competitive world book day

04:00 Ian is looking forward to not apologising…

05:30 Christmas presents (!) and Covid

07:10 Nicki’s path-

  • Taking maternity leave in the late 1990s.

  • Hard choices and work just not working for mums

  • Mum2Mum mentoring programme at Asda

  • The important role of single dad, Phil

  • That 2011 program became The Parent Mentor business

  • Her book - Mentoring New Parents at Work and a realisation that dads weren’t part of the conversation.

“I mean, it sounds obvious talking to you too now, but you know, it was quite revelation at the time.”

13:45 A pivotal moment using a mountain top image as part of icebreaker cards

Quotes template (8).png

“He held the card up and he says this was me. And I used to go mountain climbing, cycling, you know, the world was my oyster and I don't know where he is anymore.”

And he literally broke down in the session, and I said to my client afterwards, I said, if you are in any doubt about the power of what you're doing, it's in the room right now. We have to talk to dads too.

14:30 The danger of grouping parents as a single homogeneous group

15:30 The Dad Connect programme

16:15 Mentoring v Coaching

18:50 We talk about reverse mentoring

21:45 “Good enough is good enough”

23:30 Work Life Balance

“It took me to have children to respect my work-life balance and to want work flexibly. Why do we give away all that discretionary time? And why does that have to be a parenting thing to want to work flexibly?

So I think in a way the pandemic has given everyone the gift of being able to say, I have a right to a life away from work”

24:00 Hybrid working and the role of line managers

25:50 Incoming culture clash - “working from home is an aberration” ?

26:30 Will there be a generational split about office working?

28:30 The mechanics of hybrid working models

Tips

James’ choose to challenge on parenting norms

Nicki talks about checking in on a new dad back from paternity leave

Ian has been reading Why we sleep? by Matthew Walker

——————————————————————————-

Connect with Nicki

www.theparentmentor.co.uk

https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicki-seignot-647b981/

Photo Credit @kellysikkema via Unsplash

 

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Relationships, New Dad, Balance Ian Dinwiddy Relationships, New Dad, Balance Ian Dinwiddy

Why supporting new dads in the workplace is key to gender equality

The cultural norms around work are changing at a rapid rate thanks to the pandemic, but we must not allow it to widen the gender gap at work. Dads are key

Written for HR Zone

Written for HR Zone

Why supporting new dads in the workplace is key to gender equality

The cultural norms around work are changing at a rapid rate thanks to the pandemic, but we must not allow it to widen the gender gap at work. A key part of this is creating the right conditions for working dads to take on their share of the caring responsibilities.

Writing for HR Zone I explored three key themes:

1. Stressed dads seek new ways of working

2. Dads fear being seen as 'uncommitted' 

3. Equality starts at home

“Gender equality took a big hit in 2020. At the start of the pandemic, the government suspended enforcement of gender pay gap reporting. Domestically, women took on more unpaid labour and despite evidence that the first Covid-19 lockdown led to a 58% increase in childcare undertaken by men, the equality gap widened and more recently those gains appear to have rolled back. Facebook groups such as The Career Mum are full of stories from working mums taking on a disproportionate share of unpaid domestic labour, whether it’s childcare, home school support or the mental load.”

Connect with me on LinkedIn and join the debate

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Inspiration, New Dad, Relationships Ian Dinwiddy Inspiration, New Dad, Relationships Ian Dinwiddy

TV presenter Nigel Clarke Chats about The Baby Club and Dadvengers

“Everyone’s Welcome” as Nigel Clarke, CBeebies presenter, explains how Dadvengers started from an all Dads episode of The Baby Club.

TV presenter Nigel Clarke Chats about The Baby Club and Dadvengers

There’s just not enough time!

Nigel Clarke, CBeebies presenter, explains how Dadvengers started from an all Dads episode of The Baby Club, the groundbreaking show for mums, dads and carers with babies under 18 months old. The Baby Club reflects the important CBeebies mantra that “Everyone’s Welcome”.

We talk about a generational shift in what is expected from and expected by dads and the importance of dads having the skills and confidence to be alone with their kids.

Ian and Nigel try and explain to James what the Clubhouse excitement is all about and we discover how you manage a 4 hour filming session with babies, sing songs (!) and probe Nigel about parenting in the public eye and what goes on at a CBeebies Xmas party.

Contents

01:15 Using Lockdown in the most positive way we can be - “I've found a place where I'm happy.”

02:00 Nigel’s motto - “There just isn't enough time”.

03:00 Special To Do lists

04:00 Children on Teams and Clubhouse

“Somebody told me about it (Clubhouse) and I was like, this is never going to work. But if it's done right, it's like attending a really cool lecture or a really cool networking room where you share stuff.”

06:45 Trying not to get stressed - people are accommodating

08:00 CBeebies closed for a couple of weeks and we, as the presenters, were recording stuff in our homes. So I did a series of links from my lounge.

09:45 Dadchats was a place for me to just research what parents might want to see or hear about in the Dadvengers podcast.

Quotes template (3).png

11:20 We did an episode of The Baby Club just with Dads

14:55

“I'm mid forties. So I grew up with a generation where the dads were at work. You see them maybe at the weekend, maybe in the evenings, maybe briefly before they go to work in the morning.

They didn't have the opportunity to be with their kids and around them spending lots of time.”

15:45: Wanting to be more involved - The Baby Club as a platform to really help dads.

18:40 The essence of it was wanting dads from all different backgrounds who were engaged with their kids, who weren't scared to change a nappy.

20:10 The importance of making dads feel welcome.

21:00 Patience and being public figure.

21:30 I don't know if I can really call my work work.

23:30 Chaos and contagious crying - how to film an episode of The Baby Club.

24:45 I know a song that’ll stick in your head….

26:20 What happens on a CBeebies night out, stays on a CBeebies night out.

28:00 Tips

  • Men need to learn how to listen, not just talk.

  • Feel good with a squirt of aftershave.

  • Be present when your kids are there and you're spending time with them, put that phone away, drop it down.

30:44 There's not long left. We're at 13, we're two thirds of the way through, and then it's over, they're gone and they're not kids anymore.


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Career, Inspiration, New Dad Ian Dinwiddy Career, Inspiration, New Dad Ian Dinwiddy

My Inspiration - Catching the “right” Train

Learn how my experiences of navigating the emotional pressures of being a new dad inspired my business vision.

My Inspiration - Catching the “Right” train

It really goes back to 2009, when my wife and I were preparing for the arrival of our daughter, and we were thinking about how we were going to live our lives - what we were going to do differently.

The choice that we made, was that I would ask for reduced hours in 2010 after our daughter was born, and then, at some stage, about six months after she was born, I would stop work altogether. We’d have a transition period and then my wife would go back to work when her maternity leave was over.

Lisa would have 6 months of full paid maternity leave, a good job working as a lawyer in London and I was working as a Management Consultant which is also a good job, a well paid job but in terms of the financial decision, about who was best placed to look after our daughter after those early days, the decision was made that I would take a career break

Becoming a Dad

So in January 2010 our daughter was born and I moved four days a week, with my fifth day, my “at home” day was flexible, built around the business needs.

So I had a pretty good situation. I had a commutable job - consultancy could be really tough, it could be a long way away from home, but actually, for me, for us, it worked pretty well.

However, it was still really really tough. Freya had reflux, quite severe reflux in the early days, and I used to dread the time when I would phone and check in with Lisa to find out how her morning had been.

Emotional pressures

It was a lunch time call. I’d get my sandwich from downstairs… I would sit in a quiet spot outside the office and I would phone in and I would ask her how things were and depending on what she said… it would have a fundamental impact on my emotional well-being for the rest of the day. You know, particularly for her, if Freya was a bit of a nightmare and she was screaming a lot and she wouldn't feed! She was good at sleeping at night - not good during the day at all. That had a profound impact on my own emotional state for the rest of the day.

Catching the right train

What I found out later was that Lisa, knew exactly which train I was planning to get, it was the same train every day and she knew exactly what time I would walk through the door, and if I couldn't get that train, she really felt those extra 15 minutes, they made a real, real big difference to her and it really affected her, it really made the day stretch out and it went so much slower.

Initially I didn't realise the impact of that train. I had a target train. I had something I wanted to do, but knowing how important that was, was a real game-changer for me in terms of how I approached work, how I got focused in terms of leaving on time and getting the correct train.

And that's one of the initial reasons why I founded Inspiring Dads. When I reflected on my experiences, I realised I had knowledge and skills that I could use to help and support new dads through the emotional trauma of becoming a dad.


The Inspiring Dads Vision

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Active And Involved Fathers Who Stand Out, Stand Up And Make A Difference

We believe that this generation of dads is ready to embrace a new type of working life, one that blends work and family in a way rarely previously experienced by men.

No longer constrained by traditional and divisive gender norms around “bread-winning” and “caring”, these dads are ready to be the hands-on fathers they don’t remember growing up.

We know that more time spent looking after their children is good for dad’s well-being and mental health, unlocks workplace opportunities for their partners and redefines, for everyone, what “being committed” looks like.in the workplace.

This generation of dads understands that you shouldn’t have to choose between “being a great dad and having a great career”, and with the right support they will drive improved choice and gender equality for everyone.

 
Photo Credit: Kelly Sikkema via Unsplash

Photo Credit: Kelly Sikkema via Unsplash

Our Values

Flexible Working For All

Everyone wins when dads feel comfortable seeking out the type of flexible working patterns that support their desire to be an active and involved father. #Flexforall.

Supporting Dads Leads To Gender Equality

In order to create equality at home and at work, we need to move away from support that appears to be ‘perks’ just for mums (unequal parental leave, maternity coaching and part time and flexible work).

Communication Is Key

Dads need to be honest about their needs and pressures, and learn to talk openly with partners, managers and co-workers to design working lives that deliver what they and their families need.

Photo Credit: @snapsbyfox via Unsplash

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Mental Health, Relationships, Inspiration Ian Dinwiddy Mental Health, Relationships, Inspiration Ian Dinwiddy

3 Ways New Dads Can Make Life Less Stressful

Three ways to reduce your new dad stress (in association with Thriving Parents)

3 Ways New Dads Can make life less stressful

In this first post for Thriving Parents I reflect back on my experience as new dad and make three key recommendations to help new dads reduce their stress.

“It can be a really brutal learning curve, especially first-time round. In fact, I think it’s worse than most people believe it’ll be. In hindsight we Dads are painfully ill equipped to deal with the emotional and practical complexity of fatherhood.”

1. Make plans together

2. Ask for what you need

3. Pay attention to your partner’s daily pressure points

If you want to know exactly what these mean and how to implement click on this link and read on:

https://www.thriving-parents.com/blog/3-ways-new-dads-can-make-life-less-stressful

Photo Credit - Gift Habeshaw on Unsplash @gift_habeshaw

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Ian Dinwiddy, Founder

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