HELPING STRESSED DADS BALANCE WORK AND FATHERHOOD

Mental Health, Inspiration, Money Ian Dinwiddy Mental Health, Inspiration, Money Ian Dinwiddy

Our charity - 2WishUponAStar.org

Discover why we pledge 1% to 2 Wish Upon A Star

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Our Charity 2WishUponAStar.org

Today is World Suicide Prevention Day.

Today I remember Paul Burke, the family he should have seen growing up and the life he was supposed to have.

When George Burke suddenly died aged just 1 year old, Rhian and Paul were left to cope by themselves. Paul would be here today if he had had the support he needed and deserved, support that the charity 2 Wish Upon A Star now provides.

“Immediate and ongoing bereavement support for families, individuals and professionals affected by the sudden and traumatic death of a child or young adult aged 25 or under.”

Paul was a good friend of mine and I have proudly supported the charity in private capacity with an annual charity hockey match, involving alumni of University College, London and the broader University of London community and I’m now delighted to support the charity via Inspiring Dads.

The third UN Global Goal for Sustainable Development is “Good Health And Well-Being” and I pledge 1% of Inspiring Dads sales value to help fund the incredibly valuable and important work that Rhian Mannings and her 2wishuponastar team do for families across Wales.

Rhian kindly allowed me to share her words

“I never thought I would be affected by someone taking their own life. It happened to other people. I will never ever come to terms with the fact that Paul walked out and never came home. However, I truly believe I am fortunate to know why. Many never find out why their child, brother, sister, parent or friend took their own life.

To lose someone you love more than words messes with your head and heart beyond words. To lose a child, breaks you beyond description and he couldn't cope. He couldn't cope with what we saw the night we lost George, he couldn't cope with the fact he, as a Daddy, couldn't make George better and following his death, make us feel better.

What I do know is that support at the time of George's death did not exist. When George was born we had so much support from so many agencies and professionals but after our beautiful boy died - NOTHING!!! If Paul had received support I believe he would be here today watching his children grow up.

That is why 2 Wish Upon A Star is so important. That is why reaching out to people at the most difficult times is important. By being there for those who need and deserve support I hope we can prevent another Daddy (or Mummy) walking out and never coming home!!!!!! xxx”

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Masculinity, Mental Health, Inspiration Ian Dinwiddy Masculinity, Mental Health, Inspiration Ian Dinwiddy

Rhian Mannings MBE - Making a Real difference

In 2012 Rhian Mannings’ life suddenly and tragically changed when first her young son George died, followed 5 days later by her husband Paul. She then founded 2 Wish Upon A Star.

Rhian Mannings MBE - Making a Real Difference

In 2012 Rhian Mannings’ life suddenly and tragically changed when first her young son George died, followed 5 days later by her husband Paul.

In this important and uplifting conversation we explore how support was missing for bereaved parents like Rhian and Paul and how, what she imagined would be “hobby”, turned into a nationwide charity called 2 Wish Upon A Star providing immediate and ongoing bereavement support for families, individuals and professionals affected by the sudden and traumatic death of a child or young adult aged 25 or under.

We learn about the importance of the elephant in the bereavement box (and in the room) and discuss “masculinities” and how they have an impact on how and when men seek out the help they need.

Plus we scatter some celebrity stardust from the likes of Sam Warburton, Will Champion, Nick Knowles and Michael Sheen.

Contents

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01:00 Spring, getting out the house in Wales, rugby and the importance of sport

03:10 Why The Great Escape is analogy for how James feels

05:40 Rhian’s path to founding 2 Wish Upon a Star. Losing George and Paul.

“Over the next few days, what was clear, very quickly, was that there was no support available to us as a family. We were very much abandoned by the system really. Luckily we had amazing family and friends around us, we were lucky in that respect.”

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07:00 Starting the charity - I just needed something to keep me going.

08:30 Lacking support, Paul blamed himself.

“We got a piece of paper with some phone numbers on, some of them were out of order and I'm still waiting for the rest of them to contact me today.”

09:40 Going into A&E departments and asking for the person in charge

“And I said, what will happen today? If a child died suddenly? And the same thing that happened to us would have happened to them.”

11:00 Finding the strength to tell her story

12:30 Ian talks about his friendship with Paul and the first time he met Rhian

14:15 Reflecting on bereavement and how different families have coped with lockdown

15:00 Keeping 2 Wish Upon A Star going during lockdown

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16:40 The elephant in the room - memory boxes and remembering

“When George died, I'll never forget the nurses just panicked because they couldn't find anything to perhaps take some fingerprints or hand prints or some, some of his curls.”

19:00 Paul felt like he’d failed everyone

“You know, his exact words to my sister at one point was “Daddies, shouldn't let their children die” “

21:00 Multiple masculinities and the pressure men can feel

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23:00 Supporting dads - the importance of sport in the charity’s work.

24:30 The Welsh rugby team - role models for mental health

26:00 Celebrity Ambassadors - Will Champion and Nick Knowles

27:00 Super actor Michael Sheen unveiled as new ambassador!

Tips

  • Photograph your kids asleep (!)

  • Recognise when you nee to plug your battery in

  • Understand that reaching out the help is not a sign of weakness, it is often a sign of strength.

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Connect or contact with Rhian and her charity


https://twitter.com/2wishupon

https://www.2wishuponastar.org/

Learn about the OECD report - “Man Enough”

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Ian Dinwiddy, Founder

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